Well, our twins, Bruiser and Princess are turning 6 years old in a month, and it is time for us to have them in separate bedrooms. It is easier said than done, considering there are no additional bedrooms in our home. There was only one solution! Move Bruiser into his 12-year-old brother’s room………..
PRO: Great way to deal with space issue and separate boy/girl twins.
CON: Increase in fighting, name calling, and everything else one would expect from brothers, stress producer for mom and dad.
Guess that this isn’t the best solution, or even a realistic one.
The other alternative would require relocation of our office partially to the kitchen and partially to the basement……..this is the way, begrudgingly, we decided to go. What a pain to go through papers, files, and “stuff” that we accumulated over the past 12 years! We found things including: computer diskettes (don’t even know how to see what is on these), cords that we have no idea what they go to, Rolodex files (2 of them) with business cards from before the year 2000, bills dating back to 2004, highlighters and pens that haven’t probably worked in 10 years, multiple pads of paper and notebooks with less than 10 sheets of paper on them……….and the list goes on.
But then, my husband found our Adoption files. Everything stopped. Among the 10 bags filled with shredded paper, the stacks of books that we didn’t remember that we had, the vicariously balanced electronics, the bills from beyond, everything beyond the Adoption files were irrelevant…..my husband sat and looked at each file, piece by piece.
- The memories of the first time we met with our social worker. The conversations came flooding back……….domestic or international adoption? If international, what country? If domestic, how? Agency, Facilitator, Lawyer? We had so little knowledge then.
- The memories of the constant contact with our social workers once we were matched. I had saved every email between us and the social workers. Reading through the emails, we remember the emotional roller coaster that we rode.
- The receipts of my trip to visit my twins’ birth mom.
- The medical records, lawyer and agency contracts.
- A scribbled note on a piece of paper with the birth mom’s description of the “6 ft, blue eyed, ROTC” birth dad. This was quite interesting because we
ultimately met him. (We are thankful to have Mike who did have amazing blue eyes but the rest of her description was a bit off.)
- A ripped piece of scrap paper that I wrote the weight and height of each baby when they were born. I remember getting the call…….I was standing
outside my house packing our car to make our flight. I grabbed a piece of paper from the floor of my car and a crayon that JJ had left on the seat and wrote the important information.
- Plus, so much more!
Surrounded by clutter and chaos, my husband was transported into a world of peaceful memories……..some of the best memories of our life. It was like re-living the adoption experience over again…………..except this time we know how it turns out.
These precious files will bypass the shredder………..but will need to find a new place in our home. Where do they belong? I don’t know yet, but it will be somewhere worthy of these very important memories.